15 Things People Never Tell You About Being Pregnant

So I feel like I knew a lot about being pregnant before I was.  I knew tons of pregnant people, was giving loads of advice, worked in a daycare for 5 years, generally asked a lot of questions and researched everything before we conceived.

I had secret boards on Pinterest on “everything you need to know before getting pregnant” and “how to prepare for everything.”  But, alas, there are things that you can only learn if you are carrying a child.  And here they are folks:

1. Sleeping Horribly

I know this sounds like a given but you don’t realize how much sleep affects your life until you don’t have it.  That first trimester was sleepy tiredness zombie all the time so I napped whenever and slept like the dead.  But now, in my second tri, I’m not as tired but I cannot sleep well for the life of me.  It’s like your body is preparing you for waking up in the middle of the night for your upcoming child.  So strange.

2. Never Being Comfortable

This is another one that you think would be something you know.  But oh my goodness.  This child is only a couple of pounds and she is dictating my whole body.  Your back hurts, your neck hurts, and sitting on a couch comfortably has suddenly become an impossibility!  What the heck lady.  I can barely recline without being able to breathe.

3. How Unreal the First Trimester Is

I think I knew that first trimester was going to be difficult but everyone’s bodies react so differently.  For me it was constant nausea, being so sleepy, and just realizing so many changes in your body that you can’t control that affect your entire world! 

I spent Thanksgiving in Chicago with some family and I was so dependent on food and wasn’t telling anyone we were pregnant yet and I was so miserable.  Therefore I looked like a jerk-face when I needed alone time, or needed an hour to go poop, or needed to eat IMMEDIATELY.  It’s so hard not to complain when you have this precious life growing inside you but holy moley.  No one warned me.

4. Hard Poops

Aren’t you so glad I’m talking about poop now?  It’ll be quick I promise.  But you know what’s not quick?  Trying to go to the bathroom whilst being pregnant.  I had the hardest time pooping because (I’m sorry) it was so hard!  Ok I promise that’s all I’ll say about it.

5. Sleeping on Your Side Only

What is this nonsense?  I think I learned this one a few months before I got pregnant.  For the first little bit you can sleep on your back and your tummy while you still can.  But once you start getting bigger, you can’t even sleep on your back.  Also I’ve tried it.  You lose your breath!  It has something to with the new weight of your belly laying on a major blood vessel and you start to feel like you’re going to pass out.  This even happens to me if I recline or lean back in any sort of way.

6. The Insanity of Maternity Clothes

Ok, first of all, maternity clothes are stupid expensive.  I feel like a lot of people know that.  I went bargain hunting, scouring sales and borrowing from friends.  But the sizing of things are very strange.  I’m about a size 12 in pants/jeans.  The first pair of maternity pants I got was a size 6!  What!  Don’t get me wrong, please boost the ego of this feeling-flubby preggo lady.  But how on earth am I supposed to find what I need when sizing of things are so ridiculously off!?  Oh well, I feel like I have bigger problems at hand.

7. Shaving and Putting on Underwear

Let’s get real here.  Shaving things are already difficult and annoying.  But once you get that belly, things get even weirder.  Such things as cutting your toenails and easily putting on underwear are taken for granted for-the-sure.  As for shaving…certain places…I got some valuable advice from someone on this matter.  “Just pretend you’re blind and do your best.”

8. Two Hour Food Time Limit

I gradually grew hungrier and hungrier as I progressed in this pregnancy (first trimester I was not wanting to eat anything so I at all the things once I could).  But I didn’t realize how much of a schedule I was on eating-wise.  My catchphrase as of late has been “I could eat.”  If it has been 2 hours since I’ve finished eating I know I’m going to need at least a snack.  Those 2 hours have gone by and there had better be food nearby.

9. Peeing in the Middle of the Night

This was very new for me.  I am not one to pee a lot during the day, I’ve never gotten at UTI or anything like that.  So it’s been very frustrating for me for my body to waken me at 2 a.m. saying “you better use the bathroom now or else you’ll never sleep again.”  Cool bladder, cool.  Another thing that your body is prepping you for for your newborn’s schedule.

10. Realizing How Dirty Your House Is

I am not a clean person.  Everyone in my family has tidy tendencies and cleaning instincts besides me.  I keep my home clean enough for me and my husband to live here comfortably and not like pigs, clearly.  I deep clean before company comes over.

So as I write this we are in the middle of Corona-quarantine and I am that person that’s trying to get all the projects done and clean all the weird things that I’ve put off so long.  And I am seeing things that are just not acceptable to bring a child into this home! 

How many layers of dirt are on my just-mopped wood floors?  Have we never cleaned the windows in the 3 years we’ve lived here?  How does the slider track accumulate that much crap in it?  Should we rip out all the flooring and just get new?

I think I will be prepared as I can once little baby girl gets here but OH MY LANTA my house is so dirty if a child with zero antibodies touches anything.

11. The Realness of the 2 Week Wait

You guys know what the 2 week wait is?  That is the time period between when you conceive and when you actually find out you are pregnant.  IT. FEELS.  LIKE.  SIX.  YEARS.  I literally was googling what to do during this time because I thought I might go insane. 

I think I went to the movies, started a new show, did a puzzle, did a new craft project, and basically anything that would pass the time when I wasn’t working so my mind wouldn’t freak out every 5 seconds.  I didn’t realize it would be such a long wait and not to mention the time before you can safely tell people.

12. Painful Acne

This one sucks man.  I know this doesn’t happen to everyone but I got some cystic acne (and still get some).  I’ve always been pretty acne-prone, even though I’m almost 30.  But these pregnant zits are the worst.  You know that your hormones are gonna be messed up but no one tells you that these pregnant zits are going to be so awful.  They hurt, they don’t pop, and they never go away!  

13. Boobs get Weird

It’s true.  People say your boobs will start to hurt or get huge.  I get that, that’s fine.  But for real, mine got weird.  Some people’s nipples get darker.  Mine looked like the color spilled out of lines.  I kid you not, it looks like the color just leaked outside its barrier just in one tiny section.  So weird.

And the painfulness is unreal.  Imagine having your period for months and that horrible tenderness just never goes away.  Hugs are a no-no.  And that is during the time when you can’t tell anyone!  So people want to be hugging you and you’re like “no thanks.”  Did anyone else’s boobs get really weird?  I honestly would LOVE to know!

14. How Quickly You Lose Your Energy

Lately we have loved going on walks with Winston and I promise it’s less than a mile walk every time.  But, man, I can barely make it that far.  I don’t even call them our walks anymore.  I call them our strolls.  We just stroll around the park with our arms linked (mainly because Winston is pulling too hard and Nate is pulling back on the leash and I am pulling Nate back to stop walking so fast).

But I just can’t do anything without my energy bar draining.  You don’t realize it until it hits you.  Hard.  And I’m not even in that third trimester yet where I’m hearing it gets even more real.

15. How Much Love You Have for Your Baby Already

Sounds so cheesy but this little girl has stolen my heart.  Especially since she started moving and kicking and getting hiccups that I can feel, she and I have never been more connected.  People tell you these things, I know.  But until you have carry that little one, you start showing, or they kick constantly you just don’t realize you could care for someone else so much!

And I know that this feeling will just grow and grow!  I can’t wait!  Pregnancy has been so weird and unpredictable, and foreign to me but the benefits really outweigh the dumb stuff that happens to your body.  You are caring for your little peanut inside you and they already love you endlessly.  

Please let me know if you discovered anything crazy when you were pregnant.  Obviously this is my first pregnancy and I am learning!  But let me know the wonders you encountered when you were expecting because I know these things are just the tip of the iceberg.  Good luck to all you expecting mamas out there!  You are amazing humans.  And to all you other lovelies, mama or not, have a wonderful day!